Slowcoach Supporter Gifts

Sloth traffic jam.

'Have you been 'helping the environment by supporting local produce' again?'

YOLO vs YODO

Snail Pattern Balding.

Runner going through hurdles.

"Cricket...six minutes of excitement crammed into six hours!"

'I could really do with a change, couldn't you?'

'I guess we both enjoy long slow walks together.'

"RUN!"

Yes, wisdom does come with age, but it's not because we've had time to Google everything.

"Month-end report due by month end, ha ha ha ha ha."

"Refresh my memory-why do we meet once a week?"

"We suck at this."

'Gee, Doctor Dresher, you have a wonderful way with horses....

One cappuccino please, and I wanted to give you this. A note. How formal. Dear small local independent coffee house ... I went to Starbucks this morning. I'm sorry. Can you ever forgive me? What if I agree to purge what I ate? The written apology is sufficient.

"'I hate Taylor Swift'? Way to lose a lot of the young vote."

"This is on me. I did say take us to your leader."

A tortoise

Snail Pattern Balding.

"Don't even bother – we missed the deadline to finish our March Madness brackets again."

Small store loses out to glossy big store

Sign outside tortoise shell: 'Out to lunch'.

"Mr. Green and I should be there in about 2 hours!"

'You can speed it up if you want.'

"Hold your hat ! Here we go!"

"He's in lockdown."

'Hey buddy, want to race me?'

Tortoise: I've been fired from the Marching Band: I couldn't keep up...

"It's those creative types you ought to be checking on."

'Sorry, I don't brake for small animals.'

I'd join you, but this dratted self-timer only waits for ten seconds!

"Sorry to pull you over, but do you realize how fast you weren't going?"

Shop Local

"Easy does it, Ralph."

Library Returns