Slow Travel Celebrant Gifts

Two grooms/wedding guests raise a glass.

"Seriously, do you expect us to believe you put on 143 feet a day in business travel?"

"Wheeeeeeeeeee!"

Snails on road - road works 'slow' sign.

"Sorry, but your life moves so slowly that the ball keeps timing out."

Two men toasting

'I can't believe you only lasted 3 days, 9 hours and 56 minutes.'

"It sucks being reincarnated as a snail, but at least I've finally achieved home ownership."

"Dude, I don't mind watching your holiday video, but can you fast-forward it please..."

A horse and cart metamorphosing into a snail.

We're making progress, but it's still too early to be breaking out the party hats and noise-makers.

Black Velvet.

Granny takes a turtle for a walk.

"Anyone home?"

Boris Bike

"Giddyup!. . . Damn. I think I just wasted 500 bucks."

"I was involved in an awful accident, and was in a coma for three weeks. Half my life flashed before me!"

Retired Snails.

"Time travel will never happen. You'd have to be able to travel faster than the speed of a tortoise for it to be possible."

'...and that concludes this five-hour seminar on 'slow life'.'

'Are we there yet?'

"Are we there yet."

'Better slow it down a bit.'

Who you don't want to get stuck behind in summer traffic.

'On your mark...'

"We've been intersnailing."

"When life gets too hectic, I just like to stop, smell the roses, and write checks."

"I shouldn't have gone to freshen up at the interval: The second act was almost over by the time I reached my seat again..."

Snail dreams of Motor Home.

"The camper parking lot is just around the corner!"

"They look pretty angry Bob! We should consider letting them play through..."

"Well, I'd better head home. I've got a long commute back to my shell."

'Las Vegas? It's 70 years that way.'