Slow-paced Lad T-Shirts

'Stress'

"Just gotta wait 'till she wakes up."

"I'm not napping yet, but I am getting ready to with a pre-nap warm up."

'Seriously. You have to get one of these.'

Conservation Area

'My goodness,Ralph,let him have it.It's only a measly old meal worm.'

'Congratulations Mr. Dumley, you have a lovely little thing...'

Fast Food Fly-Thru

Geezer.

'I am not doing nothing... I am perfecting inertia.'

"Why run a marathon when you can sleep through it?"

"Sorry, but your life moves so slowly that the ball keeps timing out."

Ladmag - Caution, immature content.

'All he does is sleep all day but we're dog tired and lazy!'

Bird wife unhappy with the state of their birdhouse.

"It sucks being reincarnated as a snail, but at least I've finally achieved home ownership."

Tortoise Goes For A Swim

"You've got to admit, he wears the 'that dog won't hunt' label with a lot of class!"

"Yes, I'm sitting here with my head in a cloud...that's where you stored the project!"

"Dude, I don't mind watching your holiday video, but can you fast-forward it please..."

"One day junior, all this will be yours..."

"Anyone home?"

Granny takes a turtle for a walk.

"Your wife wants to know why you're not home, yet."

"My research on the effects of total inactivity in humans is nearing a breakthrough. Just one more 5-year grant should do it."

Snail Peephole

Racers' Gate.

My car idles well! It learned a lot from you!

"Hang on -- I'm going to make the jump to 90 m.p.h."

"Arlen keeps bragging about running 26 miles. What he fails to tell people is that it took him eight months to do it."

'Hmm...Sofa sores. This is becoming increasingly common in fat blokes.'

Bob Crumpet, do not disturb

"I can't believe it...summer's almost over...time has slipped through my hands...life has passed me by."

"When he wakes up, tell him he's bought it!"

"Fishing and doing nothing are not incompatible."