Slow-paced Explorer T-Shirts

"Willy here will be our guide, and according to him, this short walk should take about three months..."

I can hear a podcast of yesterday's sea.

"Seriously, do you expect us to believe you put on 143 feet a day in business travel?"

"Welcome to the French Quarter!"

Fat Kid 28- Discovers his feminine side

The Fall from Pisa

'He's always looking for an argument!'

If you think that's good, you should see the Pork Sabre!

Recession - A Zen Mindfulness Retreat

"After the truffle season peaks, we like to kick back and do a little clamming."

Define gravity! - Next Exit.

Unnatural History Museum

Turtle crossing road: 'Phew! A couple time I saw my life crawl before my eyes.'

"I need a teeny tiny handbag so I don't have to stow away my husband's wallet, phone and reading glasses."

Noah's Arc "And that's when I realized I had two of everything I needed, right in front of me, this whole time."

'Do you realise what a find this is?'

"I think I see it, guys!" "That's a rock." "Look! A dead snake." "Here's an old balloon... I think!" "World's smallest ball of twine."

Distilled Elephant

Tortoise Goes For A Swim

Institute of the Paranormal: Research Division and Crackpot Division.

Generic Products

"Hey, this is a marathon, not a sprint."

Sign Post at the Zoo Reads:'Lions, Tigers, Bears, and Oh-My.'

"Your wife wants to know why you're not home, yet."

Community Bed de Luxe

I've got no cell phone, no computer, no grumbling wife, no stupid boss. Feel free to envy me.

Ice fishing on a floating sheet of ice.

Introvert-in-a-Box

'I can hear it ringing, so my new super mini-maxi phone must be here somewhere...'

'You go and take stacks of photos. I'm going to read and I'll look at them when we get back to England.'

"Hang on -- I'm going to make the jump to 90 m.p.h."