Slow-paced Adventurer T-Shirts

"Arlen keeps bragging about running 26 miles. What he fails to tell people is that it took him eight months to do it."

Tortoise and his Little Chemist Set

"Hang on -- I'm going to make the jump to 90 m.p.h."

"Your wife wants to know why you're not home, yet."

Slower, @#%^, slower!

Snail Chariot

Slowsave.

"Fishing and doing nothing are not incompatible."

Tortoise Goes For A Swim

Pina Coladas

"I am not asking for directions."

'You just couldn't wait to try out the new Jet Ski before we got up to the lake, could you?'

"Now that we've fermented coconut milk, do we build a boat or a tiki bar?"

Desert Planet

Fishing is fine but it's not what you'd call a spectator sport.

Sinking cruise ship, with band member saved by floating on cello.

"Sure makes a change from New York!"

It is the primitive joy of hunting wild creatures.

No Caption. (A snail is shown towing snail shells on a trailer in the manner of a semi truck towing cars to an auto dealer.)

Things to do today: Practice for long distance swim.

"Willy here will be our guide, and according to him, this short walk should take about three months..."

Carrying burdens - Ghetto blaster

'I think casual fridays are getting too casual.'

"One day junior, all this will be yours..."

'I thought you were going to build a raft with that driftwood!'

'Haven't you forgotten something?'

"Ahh, up the creek with nothing but a lovely cooler of beer. What more could a man wish for?"

Granny takes a turtle for a walk.

'And remember, when you reach the speed of sound the controls work in the reverse direction.'

'Sorry friend, you must have taken a wrong turn, this is actually the mild west... but we're having pilates after lunch if you wanna stay.'

Rambler encounters an existential signpost.

And now sit back and enjoy nature as you've not seen it before...

"It's a franchise."

"I've always worked from home."

"Nice curvature."