Slow Motion Admirer T-Shirts

'Sorry I'm late -- I had to climb over a speed bump.'

'They sold the company in 2001? I was wondering why things were slow.'

'Some days I just feel so stuck in a rut that I wish I'd never been invented!'

Employee of the Month Parking

Book Me!

'Caution Speed Bump Ahead.'

'Will you marry me, Gloria?'

The Famed Florsheim Illusion.

An airplane drops a Valentine for a woman.

Snail Display Today

A sky writer writes, 'Thank you.'

Tai Chi video - can you slow it down, it's still too fast!

"Anyone home?"

'Tortoise fanciers dinner 6:30pm for 10pm'

Perpetual Motion.

Kangaroo in a plane.

'Wait...that's not a gray chested black wing hawk, that's a drone.'

'Well, it might be hard to believe now, but in my youth, I was the fastest animal on land...'

'Pinch runner, Bob! Hold him on the bag! They put this guy on for only one reason!'

Plane Rescue

'... and that one is yours!'

"And one with no bun."

"When I was small, I used to be so busy. I was always running here and rushing there. Go, go, go. That was me. Now I just ride my bike or sit around watching mindless junk on TV. My life just keeps getting better and better all the time."

"Hmmm... that's more like it!"

'I thought he'd never leave!'

'Whenever I feel the urge to travel, I go out to the airport for a couple hours, and that cures it.'

"I am running!"

"No, this video of your father running is not in slow motion."

"What do you expect a shrink to look like?"

"The snail-mail of our species is deadlier than the e-mail."

Snail hitching a lift to the other side of the garden from a tortoise

"I shouldn't have gone to freshen up at the interval: The second act was almost over by the time I reached my seat again..."

'Next semester, we're having art time after lunch.'

"What a shell!"

"Dylan needs a classroom where I don't have to talk to any of the other mothers."