Slot Machine Strategist T-Shirts

Kangaroo winning on a one-armed bandit.

Please Go Home

Planning for retirement in a casino.

'Sorry, this machine only takes small bills.'

"Isn't that the repair man, who mended that machine yesterday?"

"He was the one everyone called 'The Greatest.' Then one day, a stranger turned up in town."

'I don't like to take chances.'

'It's a penny slot--give me a hundred.'

'In the 20 minutes it took for the pit boss to come back with a comp for the $10 buffet, I lost another $500.'

Election slot machine. No matter the outcome, I always lose money.

'Eh, love. The one armed bandit at the end of the bar isn't working.'

Destination casinos...

Horse five to win, unless they change the jockey.

'Las Vegas: What happens here, is a lot less than what was happening here two years ago.'

-Psst! Back me in the 4:30! -Oh! -Surprised I can talk, huh? -No, surprised you think you can win!

Scrabble with the Hares and Tortoise

Despite his perfect 'Poker Face'. the others always seemed to know when Toby had a good hand...

'Do you think he'll win the second race?'

'I'm all in.'

'The blooming thing took a wrong turn off the course.'

'You're checking in for our flight--you don't have to play max coins.'

Monkey casino study.

'I'm not sure, but I think illegal gambling is when you win.'

'So this is how they're recovering from insolvency?'

General gets a jackpot of medals at the casino slot machine.

Early Micronesian Casino

An affair to remember.

A bet over spelling

'You had to go for a walk--now we've lost our table.'

'Sir, would you please come with us?'

'We finally found a way to break the deadlock in our negotiations. I'll need a deck of cards and some poker chips.'

'I should have stuck to my hunch, to stay at home.'

"You're under arrest. . . fly tipping."

One Armed Bandit

"You lose again...!"