Slot Machine Maestro Gifts

'I came for the $1.99 seafood buffet--I'm staying for the restrooms.'

"This is not permanent...we'll be back as soon as things start to look up."

Profit

'The prevailing wisdom is that markets are always right. I think that luck is always right.'

'He's so rich, when he writes a cheque the bank bounces.'

Desk plaques: 'Money isn't everything' '...Which makes it no less awesome in my opinion.'

"You've just got to have the biggest and the best, have'nt you?!"

"We need to change, but WHEN?"

"I thought you were making a coffee table?"

"Basically, your new job here at the Treasury Department implementing the bailout is simple, Grayson, just grab and armful of money and run..."

"I'm not happy about what the economists are predicting."

"I can always tell when Philip is working on family finances. A 'cursor' appears on both sides of the computer screen."

'When investment bankers give parental advice'

"I need to increase my salary so I can increase my spending."

"I guess someone got up on the wrong side of the podium today."

'Uh - oh... this looks like an unfriendly takeover!'

'I think I must be ambidextrous. I can calculate interest with both sides of my brain.'

"Genius is 1% inspiration, 99% budget allocation."

'Now this is my kind of green!'

'Need I tell you the name of the game?'

Early Attempt at Quantitative Easing.

'Howard's doing things he's always wanted to with his redundancy money.'

"Tax evasion is like a cancer, it's growing exponentially!"

'And this is my strategic money reserve.'

Bank cashier sits near sign: 'Please do not ask for credit, as refusal often offends'.

Heroic Rescue from a Falling Tower

U.S. Credit Rating

'I used to work for the Treasury Department, but there's no future in economic forecasts.'

Wealth Juggler.

'If we're going to have a banking relationship, you'll have to trust me more than this.'

'Please remember, it's not a lie if it turns a profit.'

'Since we all have to believe in something, I thought, 'Why not money?''

US dollar rising and falling.

'One thing about being in the drivers seat -- you pay for the gas.'