Sleep Study Humorist Gifts

"Crawford's hard at work, I see!"

"Clearly the patient's experiencing difficulty attaining the deep, final level of restful sleep."

The downside of the cupcake bed.

"Today is my second birthday and I wanted to let you know that I intend to take full advantage of my terrible twos!"

"Look, if it wasn’t me and it wasn’t you, who was doing all the snoring?!"

'Wake up! You're kissing the sheet again...'

Overnight Programming

'It's your turn, dear.'

“Is the light bothering you, dear?”

"What time should we wake him for breakfast?"

'It's these sleeper terrorists, doctor. They're keeping me awake at night.'

'Peel is sleeping badly.' - 'He seems very bright.' - 'Yes.' - 'Bright babies often sleep badly.' - 'Waaaaah!' - 'I want a thick baby.' - 'Zzzzzzz'

'Give me one of your lectures, Dad - I can't sleep!'

Doze: the magazine for slumber enthusiasts

"Don't be alarmed, I couldn't sleep: I'm just here to count you. . ."

"And the important thing is to make sure you wake them up EVERY HOUR during the night."

"Decaf... I distinctly ordered DECAF."

Counting sheep hurdling.

Wide eyed owl drinking coffee.

'Mom, did you know that if you turn the clock upside down, '4:45' spells 'Shh?''

'Was it the non-flying dream again?'

"After tonight you're going to need a prescription."

Things my cat says at 3 am

Your fingers' worst nightmares

Please tell me you were sleepswimming again.

"Just go already!" "One could scarcely desire more delightful conditions for a nocturnal ramble..."

"Your snoring is really getting out of control."

Wireless Plans. Cellphone. No, "rollover minutes" has nothing to do with hitting the snooze alarm and going back to sleep.

"A child is like coffee. It's easy to make, but then won't let you sleep."

"They were great snorers."

'Marmaduke, wake up! You're barking in your sleep again!'

"I can't remember how to fall asleep. What do you have for insomnesia?"

'I told you not to drink coffee before hibernating!'

'I'll call you back. I'm sleepwalking.'

"That was one loud thunderstorm last night."