Sleep Study Humorist Gifts

"Crawford's hard at work, I see!"

"Clearly the patient's experiencing difficulty attaining the deep, final level of restful sleep."

The downside of the cupcake bed.

"Look, if it wasn’t me and it wasn’t you, who was doing all the snoring?!"

Overnight Programming

'It's your turn, dear.'

'It's these sleeper terrorists, doctor. They're keeping me awake at night.'

“Is the light bothering you, dear?”

"What time should we wake him for breakfast?"

'Peel is sleeping badly.' - 'He seems very bright.' - 'Yes.' - 'Bright babies often sleep badly.' - 'Waaaaah!' - 'I want a thick baby.' - 'Zzzzzzz'

'Give me one of your lectures, Dad - I can't sleep!'

"And the important thing is to make sure you wake them up EVERY HOUR during the night."

Doze: the magazine for slumber enthusiasts

"Don't be alarmed, I couldn't sleep: I'm just here to count you. . ."

"Decaf... I distinctly ordered DECAF."

Wide eyed owl drinking coffee.

'Mom, did you know that if you turn the clock upside down, '4:45' spells 'Shh?''

'Was it the non-flying dream again?'

Your fingers' worst nightmares

"Just go already!" "One could scarcely desire more delightful conditions for a nocturnal ramble..."

Things my cat says at 3 am

"After tonight you're going to need a prescription."

"Your snoring is really getting out of control."

"They were great snorers."

'Marmaduke, wake up! You're barking in your sleep again!'

"I can't remember how to fall asleep. What do you have for insomnesia?"

"That was one loud thunderstorm last night."

'I told you not to drink coffee before hibernating!'

'I'll call you back. I'm sleepwalking.'

"A child is like coffee. It's easy to make, but then won't let you sleep."

Rip Van Winkle shouldn't have switched to that new gourmet ultra-decaffeinated coffee.