Sky-high Diner T-Shirts

'Where are you headed?' 'Oh, I'm just here for the food.'

"This place is one of New York's best-kept secrets."

'You sent your wife to get a bottle of wine from the wine cellar? Your jet doesn't have a wine cellar.'

'Do you want me to get the fish bone out, or not?'

'Wow! That's got to be some sort of record!'

"We suggest you study the menu in our reading room before being seated in the dining room."

"For drinks or dinner?"

"And I get a really, really tall straw?"

Leftovers restaurant - for that unpretentious dining.

"One spaghetti, and two straws please."

'Tomato ketchup?' 'Well you wanted the house red.'

'The customer is always right...'

Dave's Hamburger Shop

"I read that meat can remain undigested in one's intestines for five years...."

"Why don't I start you off with the contact information of everyone who's read those menus over the last 14 days?"

"When I eat out, I like to order something I would never make at home."

"If you don't like the chicken, perhaps we can have the air marshal shoot a goose."

"My apologies, but that's not a meatball. That's my computer mouse. I've been looking for it."

"When it's extremely cold out, I prefer flambés to winter stews."

"See? I told you my fish was undercooked!"

'It probably wasn't a good idea to ask for seperate cheques.'

"There's a free pudding for whoever finds the Chef's glass eye."

'Waiter...!' (there is a human in my soup)

"We'd like a quiet table for two where my wife can justify spending three grand on a handbag."

Road Kill Cafe.

'I dreamed I was flying and I had airline food.'

'If that is a toenail, it is a French toenail.'

"Dinner looks delicious."

'I'm afraid things are rather confused around here today, sir- the Soup of the Day is a grilled-cheese sandwich'

"The pizza guy wants to know what floor we're on."

' Well..She did it to me again.'

"There are no animal products in our dishes, but since the meals are prepared by animals, you may find some stray hairs."

"Yes Dad! I can see the ground way way down below very clearly! It's not unrelated to my reluctance to try flying!"

How To Turn A Closed-Down Nuclear Reactor Into A Theme Restaurant: A Master Plan.