Size Doesn't Matter Believer T-Shirts

'This is Bob. He's really short, but he's got quick hands, watch.'

"The weatherman said dress for the mid 70's. Bob was elated." "Much. Too. Sexy."

'This is too small. Get me a 12...How many times?! I'm a 10 or a 12 on top and a 12 or 14 on the bottom depending on the shop, the cut of the fabric, the ambient air temperature, and the rotation of Pluto...and we always try the 10 first capiche?'

'Reach up and fold down into Uttanasa.' - 'Notice how you feel both physically and spiritually.' - 'Physically, I feel that my toenails are a bit too long.' - 'Hmmm... okay, what about spiritually?'

"Take. Your. Time!"

"We give thanks for superfast broadband, 4G connectivity ..."

Image changing.

'There goes the world's largest fish.' (fish bowl)

"I think he stood on a nettle."

Young Jesus learning to walk on water with waterwings around his ankles.

Less is less

'Sport-utlility suit.'

'Those stretching exercises you have been practicing are really working!'

"Ignore the side effect scares - I've had both jabs in each arm - I'm getting my booster in this one!"

'Great photo, you're lucky! I've always been too big to sit on Santa's knees...'

"Tomorrow’s the day. I’ve been waiting in line for 'Deadpool & Wolverine' for months." "What on earth are you talking about, little buddy?" "Well, it’s not exactly me. It’s a kid I paid, he’s holding my spot." "Wait… Please tell me you didn’t pay a kid to not go home for two months." "It doesn’t sound so good the way you say it."

'Anything besides the three lotto tickets?'

"It's pulling to the left."

"Have I suddenly developed Acromegaly, or are cans and bottles just getting smaller?"

"Help this athlete grow bigger and stronger, so that when he goes into the ring, he can beat the brains our of his opponent."

"You mean to say, you don't even have broadband?"

"Jesus, how many times have I told you that's not a toy?"

'I think it's time to diet. I'm beginning to see my backside from the front.'

'It's better than Prozac. I no longer worry about the ozone layer, sulfur dioxide, ultraviolet rays...'

'I bought the biggest tent on the market. It's a man thing.'

'I couldn't find a thing not to wear.'