Situation Sergeant Pillows

'Friend of foe?'

"What's with the Tim Russert act?"

'He's a retired Drill-Sergeant!'

"Lemming Boot Camp"

'I never saw a tracer bullet that I didn't admire for color, clarity and swiftness.'

Frankenstein's monster picking out his brain for the day.

"I've never liked 'im - he's an attention seeker!"

"You guys need to #@%!% fight harder. You're all #@%!% wimps! You call yourselves a #@%!% army? Bull%#!*!"

"If I go to the party alone, will I be able to leave when I want? But then, there's always the possibility that I will get stuck talking to someone. I can't shake the problem is me. What if no one else likes me? I'm the only one being critical... The issue is I'm not enough and it's really so huge." "The over thinker"

A yeoman misunderstanding an order from his drill-sergeant

'I keep yelling at my privates.'

'Being a Drill Sergeant isn't s tough - all you got to know is how to count to four.'

"It's early days but the new variant does seem a lot less aggressive!"

My army drill instructors license plate is HUP-2-3-4.

"Cruz! Are you eyeballin’ me? Eyes shut during savasana! You hear me? Lance, get up and give me 10 headstand pushups to help Cruz here shut her eyes."

Panic Button

"Hello, A and E, which department do you need, stabbing, shooting or general GBH?"

Passages in the Life of a Volunteer

'I heard you mom is really strict.'

Home Economics with an Attitude...

"In the mid 60s I received both my draft card and a Valentine's Day card on February 14th. Being a conscientious objector to both love and war, I burned both cards."

"Was it you dad's idea to play 'taps' at our wedding?"

"I can't heeear you!"

'March up that hill! And smile once in awhile, will you!'

"Then it's agreed. I'll send you a lieutenant in exchange for a clerk typist and a staff sergeant."

“Sarge - When do I get to blow shit up?”

"Folsom's seasick, sir."

'…and if you feel dizzy and pass out - pass out lying at attention!'

"Listen up! When I yell 'hop' you say 'how high?!'"

Puss in Bootcamp

"Introspe-e-ec-shun!"

Extreme camouflage

Angler dreams of the fish he thinks he's caught, unaware of his actual catch...an octopus.