Sister With Kids Pillows

'Oh my god, I forgot I had children.'

Mummies and babies having a natter over lunch.

'You reckon your Pram' will do 'nought to four miles per hour in ten seconds'...I wasn't born yesterday, you know!'

"We realize that kids start using technology at a younger age these days, so our strollers come with Bluetooth, Wi-Fi and GPS."

"There's something about ripping the stuffing out of a toy that turns me into a wild dog. I'm afraid I actually like that feeling."

"I saved us a hundred bucks on a Jolly Jumper."

Collies Without Borders

"Darling... I think the Baby's been eating the fridge magnets again."

I'm beginning to regret buying that Roomba.

"He sits there all day waiting to chase the email man."

"That table is yours once that party decides to move to the suburbs."

'Motherhood is great, but I get a really sore back...'

'Now, you're new here, but you should know the rules: I get Master's newspaper and slippers! Got that?'

"I'm exempt from the company fitness program. I have triplets at home."

Pet Entertainers

'The dripping keeps me awake!'

'Oh that just means he wants you to rub his tummy.'

"We get fantastic indoor facilities during the cold months."

-THIRTY thousand? I thought you wanted TEN thousand? -I'm having triplets!

"Being a parent is like being in prison. . . except we don't get the hour of exercise."

"I'm OK. But I think the dog wants to go out."

People with pet dogs in a dog park with workout equipment for dogs.

I can't afford to pay for Fluffy's spay...

'I've finally learned to delegate.'

"I'm expected for dinner around seven. Other than that I'm completely free."

'He's a son-of-a-bitch but he's our son-of-a-bitch!'

"Going to the beach with kids Sand in eyes, food, crevices Chasing after them with sun cream Frantically checking they haven't been kidnapped or swept out to sea Enjoying it"

'No provision for day care, eh?'

Sound Advice

'Amazing, isn't it? - And she's never taken a parenting class.'

'You're having antoher doggie treat party, right?'

"She's a Malaysian Longhair, but we don't know what."

Argument between Disposable or Washable Nappies

'No Sandra, I don't hear a whistle either. '

Mischievous Pets