Sip Sergeant T-Shirts

"Umm ... not sure what notes you'll detect on your palate, but it'll get you ripped."

"Is there any way I can un-drink this wine?"

"911, what is your major malfunction?"

'He's a retired Drill-Sergeant!'

"Lemming Boot Camp"

'I never saw a tracer bullet that I didn't admire for color, clarity and swiftness.'

'Next time you hear confession from that barmaid say, Tut-tut not COR.'

My first mistake.

"I've joined a wine-lovers club. . . so far there are only three members."

"I've never liked 'im - he's an attention seeker!"

"House red, sir?"

"You guys need to #@%!% fight harder. You're all #@%!% wimps! You call yourselves a #@%!% army? Bull%#!*!"

A yeoman misunderstanding an order from his drill-sergeant

My army drill instructors license plate is HUP-2-3-4.

"Cruz! Are you eyeballin’ me? Eyes shut during savasana! You hear me? Lance, get up and give me 10 headstand pushups to help Cruz here shut her eyes."

'Being a Drill Sergeant isn't s tough - all you got to know is how to count to four.'

'I keep yelling at my privates.'

'I heard you mom is really strict.'

"Is something funny, soldier?"

Passages in the Life of a Volunteer

"Yes, that'll be fine. I think my wife would like something to drink too."

'...and the Brewery are considering giving you a loyaly card!'

'March up that hill! And smile once in awhile, will you!'

Home Economics with an Attitude...

"i'm trying to remember the type of California white wine but I like, but my mind keeps drawing a blanc."

"Was it you dad's idea to play 'taps' at our wedding?"

"Folsom's seasick, sir."

"Then it's agreed. I'll send you a lieutenant in exchange for a clerk typist and a staff sergeant."

"I can't heeear you!"

"Medicine is giving the eat-drink-and-be-merry model another look."

'…and if you feel dizzy and pass out - pass out lying at attention!'

"Are you really sure we're supposed to give points for sound?"

"Listen up! When I yell 'hop' you say 'how high?!'"

Puss in Bootcamp

"Introspe-e-ec-shun!"