Sinister Shopper Gifts

"What kind of deal can you give me on 7 or 8 trillion of those collars?"

Jungle Stores.

They get into debt so fast these days...

"Extra large sanitary pads and extra small ones, pads for the night..."

'It's amazing! I'm a magician! I can make a weekly wage disappear in four hours!'

SERMONS 'R' US - everything for the clergy.

Seven deadly sins shopping plaza

'I'm home, Honey! Come see what I picked up at the Farmers Market!'

Down on Her.

'I'm sure they make it up in volume.'

It was an impulse buy.

Clown in supermarket looking at a tin of Canned Laughter.

A sign outside the "Museum of Modern Gift Items" reads "T-shirts of the Masters Sale".

Seven deadly sins store

'How do I know if it's seaworthy?'

Health Centre/All Night Stress Counselling

"What grade would you like - basic, better or best?"

Maze Leading to a Cheese Shop

White Sale

"Who'd have thought it? It turns out you can take it with you when you die."

Vending Machine: Epiphanies... Now in six yummy varieties!

Apostle shopping at 'Aeroapostle' Store.

'Do you have any oranges?'

"Murder, eh? They nabbed me for bargain-hunting without a license."

"Sometimes I like to browse the men's section just to screw with the patriarchy."

Frankenstein Collectibles: Buyer Beware

"Classic ballcap $79.95. White, black, red or blue. Adjustable. One size fits all."

'Midnight Galas, dinner at the Captain's table, the Swinging Singles Bar, exotic tropical nights... if I may say so, Miss Winslow... this cruise is you!'

'Been coming here for years and never bumped into anyone who knows me . . . weird!'

'When will you learn? You're only paying for the label!'

"If there are more than two people in front of you - we will open another superstore."

Undercover Santa

Poor Holiday Gift Choice...The Lucifer 2500, Talking GPS Device.

Mail-Order Yard Sale

Last minute gift ideas