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'Don't bite. They're trolling again.'

"I just wish the Earth was as beautiful to live on as it is to look at... It's right behind me, isn't it?"

'Tell your boss we represent an independent watchdog committee.'

"Of course, the actual honey is all made overseas."

Athens Playhouse. Euclid is rehearsing a play he wrote about lust, money and lies. Investment Sales Office. Don't be obtuse! Face each other from this angle! He's a tough director. It's surprising that Euclid, the father of geometry, wrote about passion, money and deceit. I thought so too, until I read the script. It's a story about a pyramid scheme and a love triangle!

The Family Joules: Part 3

'Welcome! Highly placed, unidentified administration spokespersons convention.'

"Paper or plastic?"

"OK, well, if you do hear anything, be sure to give us a call."

"Well, we can kiss being free-range goodbye."

"Wow. I just had a near life experience!"

'Actually, we don't like the term 'cannibal', we prefer to be called 'homovores'.'

"So, colony collapse disorder - how funny is it?"

"Make it look like an accident"

"Religion, politics, sex...in this part of the world every cartoonist is free to draw whatever he wants!"

Deviled HamDeviled Eggs.

Hades Movie Awards After Show. The dealy sins were all here -- They love walking the red carpet! Pride won tonight for a leading role and envy won for a supporting role. Wrath was seen yelling at at the paparazzi ... Lust tried to meet beautiful actresses ... and Gluttony rushed off to the buffet. Greed is already counting all the money he'll make because he won an award. And when sloth won, he received the night's biggest ovation ... because he was too lazy to give an acceptance speech!

'Your Majesty, the peasants are out of bread', 'Then let them eat low-carb stuff,'

'Of course cutting back on this level of bureaucracy will require a lot of work...'

Man asking what is a stall at the opera

'The gypper was up to his genua in testoons.'

"I'm sorry, sir, but a blade's a blade."

If it's any consolation, you burned the bejeezus out of his finger.

How can you read that comic strip Blondie? Its about a kinder, simpler time. It's about ancient history. They do the same material over and over. Exactly. I can count on it. Not like your stupid Pearls and Get fuzzy. Oooh, look how angry and edgy they are. They're sooo clever! Your whole gig is being angry and edgy. Look, I'm setting Candorville on fire.

Evolution in the Era of the Selfie

'You're free to go. Another suspect matching the description of having big ears and a trunk has just been arrested for the circus stampede.'

'To hell with the rules.'

"Tell me, have you ever been in a church prior to getting married?"

'I miss the evildoers.'

"True, I'm from pest control...but we don't eliminate internet trolls."

"You think you have it bad? I look like this and I don't know anything about technology."

'It was a split decision.'

'I'm being released on Blu-ray.'

"See, it's right here in the pre-nup, Louise; if you walk out, I get two week severance sex."