Single's Event Pillows

Speed Dating Disasters

The secret of living happily ever after....Do it alone.

"Whine and cheezed party."

A man reads a book called 'Opening Lines' while a woman reads a book called 'Brush Offs'.

"Don't wait too long for Mr. Right or you'll end up with Mr. What's left!"

"Teri tells me you're ostensibly straight.."

"If at first you don't succeed, buy me another drink."

Wedding - throw the bouquet and the little black book.

"Do you know what girls want?"

'Yeah, but this time she just said no -- there wasn't any hysterical laughter!'

Brenda second-guesses her decision to date a wi-fi hotspot.

'She won't even look at me. It's like I'm a banner ad.'

'I'm thinking the bee beard is the main reson that you're still single'

Eric knew where all the real slappers hang out.

"I think you two may hit it off. Craig, here, is an attractive male academic in his early forties who seeks a warm, vivacious woman delighting in conversation, arts, and nature for an evolving romantic commitment, possibly marriage, while you, Vivian, are a good-looking, intelligent, stimulating woman in her late thirties who seeks an educated, unattached, well-bred man concerned with ideas, culture, and the environment with whom to share your life interests and companionship."

"hmm....I'd like to tick her box."

"I used to think maybe I was the problem but then I realized she was just a bitch."

'You asked her to go out with you?', 'Yes, but she says there's a lengthy approval process.'

"He's your type--gorgeous, successful, and totally unavailable."

Peg Party.

'Hey baby - where you been all my lives?'

'Online dating is rubbish. I've written to 20 women and not ONE has replied.' 'At least you're being spurned in the comfort of your own home.'

Closing Laugh Singles Bar

'Those girls must be in a cone of silence. I talked to them and they acted like they couldn't hear me.'

'If you're God's gift to women, I'd rather just have the money.'

'This year I'm celebrating Valentines Day by myself, I have to economize.'

'Yes, I believe in love at first sight. Apparently you believe love is blind.'

5-hour relationship drug.

He sounds like a hunk, his profile says bulky and athletic

A group of friends singing

"When I ask myself out, I always say yesh...."

Man marooned on island sets up bar for 'singles night'.

First Date: 'Using a ten year old photo on your dating profile is one thing, using a ten year old photo of a male model is quite another!'

"Please bear with me. I'm only recently back on the singles scene."