Single Malt Lover Pillows

'Who cares about the porridge! Thank God she didn't find my single malts!'

"I'm filled with the holiday spirit. Single malt scotch."

Give us a drink that says "we're in love." Oh no, not again. Today's Special. Latte + 1hr web $12.50. We're back together. We're celebrating. Give us my darling pudding pie's favorite drink. A cinnamon mocha latte with a peppermint lollipop swizzle stick. Excuse me?! That is not my favorite drink ... dear. My favorite drink is a cinnamon mocha latte with a spearmint lollipop swizzle stick ... dear. I am so sorry ... snookums. How could I have possibly been so heartless and thoughtless as to con

Like, Latte. So that's a vanilla almond with soy, extra foam, whipped cream, nutmeg, and caramel. Leave room for coffee?

"This brew is quite hoppy - they must of added too much toad."

"I can't give you a prescription for milk and cookies."

'No standing while room is in motion.'

'Excuse me, but do you have a decaffeinated baristo?'

You've Had Enough!

"Grapes, Rye, Malt... I got into this through my vegetarianism."

"How about we settle your tab from the regular season?"

'Here comes your own personal weekly beer supply, Joe!'

"They’re real."

"It said this 'Spilt Coffee' series afforded her a lifetime of lattes."

"You have a co-pay...two cookies and a glass of milk."

"The after-dinner mint is the boss's idea. I think it's superfluous."

Monitor lizard becomes milk monitor.

"Devi's brew?"

Coffee shop

'Your switching to Scotch? And after I've given you the best beers of my life!'

National Coffee Day

"A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single malt."

Running Latte

'Mom, the donut is drinking my milk!'

'You've had enough.'

'I'm a purist. I don't take anything in my Vanilla Mocha Dulce Latte.'

3 Pointless Things To Do At Christmas: Add a little festivity to your favourite fast food/Look up an old friend/Murder the Scotch.

'After a Gadzillon glasses of milk and cookies who wouldn't have an upset stomach?'

If you can't afford the milk you drink, there are options. I can put you on a payment plan. Minimal APR since you're such a valued customer. Valued?! You hardly treat me like I'm valued, you miser! YOU TREAT ME WITH CONTEMPT! Good point. Maximum APR, then.

'I'm sorry but I have to let you go, we're all drinking 2%.'

"I said hot, boiling oil! Not cold, refreshing milk!"

"I said, the brewery has rather overdone the ambiance in here..."

'What's the chance of getting a latte around here?'

'Just as I suspected, guys - looks like we'be got ourselves an undercover wine drinker.'

"I'd like a fat-free, gluten-free, MSG-free, mini, super-skinny, artisan latte please..."