Singing Competitions Pillows

'Congratulations on reaching the grand final, how does it feel to be the biggest loser of all time?'

'Usual Saturday night crap.'

"Too late! George has spotted that the new series of X-factor has started!"

"This is a lovely old song that tells of a young woman who leaves her cottage, and goes off to work. She arrives at her destination, and places some solid NHHS in a flask containing 0.50 atm ofammonia, and attempts to determine the pressures of ammonia and hydrogen sulide when equilibrium is reached."

"Here's another one written in E minor and in case you haven't guessed by now, it's the only chord I know."

Brian was very proud of his dog.

Unforgettable, that's what you are... Gnat King Cole

"God, I hope no one asks me to sing."

'Your shoe's untied.'

Papageno from The Magic Flute

A Fairytale Update

"I had a fear of speaking in front of people, which is why I shadow puppet and sing the lessons."

'He went in for the Worst Singer and won first prize in the Gurning competition at the same time!'

"Yeah, I got into trouble, but I think the principal really enjoyed my rendition of 'I Did It My Way.'"

"Woke up this morning, someone had nicked my guitar..."

'Oh, it's a long, long time...From here to November...'

"Michael, your father and I are worried that you're awfully young to be singing the blues."

Red Letter Days - A declaration of love in public

'Due to the poor response to the roof repair fund we cannot afford to lift the rafters when rejoicing in song.'

Fish, singing: 'I'm a sole man..'

"That is an outrageous slur."

"It started rather well, but then, you sang two wrong notes, so that's a fail in my book. Try again at the next mating season..."

Big Hank's shooting gallery.

Girl Band, "I wish you'd tell your mum we don't need her in the group!"

...gon make you sweat...gon make you groove

"Just one more thump. . . just one more thump."

"That's it, Tom. Here they come. Just keep playing 'Freebird.'"

"Please! No harmonizing during ululations!"

Tuning Up for the Air Guitar Competition

Wolf Karaoke

'You do a passable Jerry Lewis, but your Frank Sinatra stinks.'

Non-Denominational Carols