Singalong Savant T-Shirts

"Oh, we'll hang Kaiser BIll to the sour-apple tree..."

Peter's Pitas - now with pickled peppers.

What are you in the mood to get confused watching tonight?

Angel wears t-shirt with logo: YOLO.

"A trillion bottles of beer on the wall, a trillion bottles of beer..."

Golf lessons

East End Maps.

"Well, the hills were alive with the sound of music...I'm sure!"

Sandwich snob.

"Now, how many of you liked the viola player best?"

"You'll have to imagine the melody for this next song too."

It's not a love bite, I just play the violin.

'You're in trouble. Your confidential memo went toxic and so did that tuna salad.'

Computer grabs man and tells him to stop it.

I'd like it sliced thin for sandwiches.

Old McDonald bed & breakfast...NO EIEIOing after 10PM.

"What would make it perfect, egg salad or pastrami?"

"This means that my dad is climbing Everest with my cheese and pickle sandwich!"

'Welcome to 'Wall Street Speaks'... and now our next guest is an expert on street talk.'

"Have you considered the consequences? It's a very slippery slope."

I rented a car from Hertz the other day, and there was a camera in it. Really? Someone forgot their camera? No, I mean in the dashboard. There was a little camera pointed at me. I have no idea who or what was watching me. Maybe it was Hertz. Maybe it was the NSA. Maybe it was for American Idol auditions. To cover all my bases, I sang the Star-Spangled Banner the whole drive. I'm never renting from Hertz again.

'Here's a song that's been done to death.'

"It's a slow hit man!"

Singalong.

'Let me know when you're ready for the Great American tuna fish sandwich.'

'Hank, I don't think this a good time to eat a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.'

'This injection is a combination of 16 drugs...

Product placement in cartoons.

'Where did he learn to carry a tune?'

"Profession?"

"This straw sucks! 'Er not."

Wow! He can hear a song just once and then play it? Yeah, he has a phonographic memory!

Take a train, take a bus, take a plane, don't make a fuss...

"And as the oceans rise, so too will our power!"

"So, Humberto, you moved to the United States just last month?"