Silicon Valley Satirist Pillows

"I wrote this one after my third startup failed. It’s called ‘I Got Yer App Right Here.’"

'According to our statistics department, 78.93 of the statistics they produce are worthless.'

The cell phone soother for life.

Wolf Danny With "Random""The work must be tantamount to mayhem. Making an insatiable public confused, indifferent, annoyed—this is the premise on which rests my deliberately vacuous oeuvre."

Indian rajah rowing elephant in a monsoon flood.

"Gee, thanks pal."

"Is it me, or is Jasper Johns a genius?" "Über-genius, Larry. Über!"

"This cruise is getting a very stern review from me, I can tell you."

Welcome to Mauritius Home of the Dodo Burger

Non-Creative Writing, Also Known as Plagiarism 101.

"So, like, don't make any big plans for this weekend."

"That's not a knife crime initiative. That's a knife crime initiative!"

'He doesn't like people walking in - try crawling.'

"Now you can send it."

"I see the White House didn't lower the flag to half staff."

'I don't think the employees like me.'

'Mr. Dunbarter, your fantasy that 'greed is good' may be a case of economic insanity.'

"I'm starting my own movement—Occupy Fifty-Seventh Street."

Kid arrives with CCTV camera, saying: 'It followed me home, can we keep it?'

"I swear, Mr. Drumpf, I meant it in the best sense of the word." "Mr. Drumpf is a moron."

Looks Like They're Finally Renovating The Toilet

"I didn't invent the wheel. I invented the pizza."

'I don't like reading on screen, so I'm printing the internet to look at it later.'

German School

Plight of Decent-White-Male-Middle Class Scapgoats.

"You can't offend me. I never mix religion or politics with reality."

Bank P45's - 'Cashier number 5 please.'

Man with dollar sign on his t-shirt.

The Evolution Of Man

I know it seems a bit misplaced, but it does pay all the wedding expenses !'

Harris, our Annual Report has been criticised for lack of clarity - well done.