Silent Conversationalist Pillows

"Why the silent treatment?"

"Is it your turn to star a conversation, or was that last month?"

Bob longed to be part of the conversation – but the stupid forest never let him get a word in edgewise.

'Yak, yak, yak.'

"I disagree — I think humans are funny."

"Don't even think about it."

A mime and his pet parrot talk to one another.

"Oui, c'est bon. It is, how you Americans say, 'Magically Delicious'."

"Do you mind if I bounce something off you?"

Marcel Marceau's parrot

'We just don't talk anymore, Gerald!'

"I think it's time we learned to stand up for our selves."

Mime Baby

'. . . Just thought I'd drop you a mime!'

'Oh, Olivia, I just love your new caption! Where on earth did you find it?'

Mime marriage.

Philosopher's pub with 24 hour thinking.

Mime father in the delivery room.

"Every single day, guys ask you for advice about women, work, sports... Haven't you ever even heard of the law of supply and demand?. . .I'd be glad to steer the downtrodden and the forlorn your way for a mere 82% of the man-to-man-talk fee."

"I devote most of my time to defending the bastions of culture."

Their father would frequently have to barge in and pantomime to his kids that they were not being quiet enough as they pantomimed actual noisy children.

"The first rule of miming is you don't talk about miming."

'Oh sure, Your Honor, he can speak. He's using sign language ...

"Frankly, I just want to talk about how great I am non-stop and uninterrupted for 50 minutes every week on a long term basis."

"I don't mind emotional trauma if I can turn it into a really funny anecdote."

"It was a slow day - my pedometer says I only put in 1, 273, 426 steps."

A lesson in wit

Student: 'Is the medical marijuana thing a grass-roots movement?'

'It's funny - I'm a Bourbon, but I've always preferred Scotch.'

The first rule of mime club is: You Do Not Talk About Mime Club!

Quiet Quitting

'I've found taking a sip of another table's wine is an effective conversation starter.'

Revenge is a dish best served cold.

Counsel for the prosecution makes its closing argument in mime court.

'He hacked it off because the women in his weekly painting group never stopped gassing!'