Sign Sage T-Shirts

One way only.

Caution - Sign partly concealed by bush

A little help.

"Finally, after years of work, irrefutable proof that I'm a nerd."

'Anything you can compute I can compute better. I can compute anything better than you.'

"I got all 'Cs', but I call that an 'A' report card...'A' for 'Average.'"

"So have you ever stopped to ask yourself: If he really knew the secrets of the universe, would he be living in a damn cave?"

A book reviewer reads between the margins.

'My teacher said the school has tough new standards and I need to improve my vocabulary. What's 'vocabulary'?'

One can hardly be expected to solve the riddle of existence without a computer

'Ere-we distinctly asked for SAM an' Ella!'

"You've done it - you've come up with the perfect password."

The chairman's boat springs a leak: 'Just keep bailing and never mind the wisecracks.'

"Do I look like a wise man to you?"

The chip - Loyal worker, tireless teacher, friend

'Stop gritting your teeth!'

"Rough year?" (2021 new year baby asking 2020 old year man)

"...At what point do hemorrhoids become 'just another hobby?'"

"It's nice of you to say so, Ben, but somehow the idea of 'Shakespeare in the Park' doesn't really appeal to me."

'Maybe I'm not a failure — maybe I'm just a late bloomer!'

'Wh-h-hatz-u-upp, dude?'

The past only looks good when you're living in the present.

'There goes Mr. Negativity.'

'How many potatoes to make a bottle of vodka?.'

"It's not real meditation when you SMIRK like that!"

"Don't be discouraged. Do it over, monitor the results...write your paper."

"It needs more old salt."

Distilleries Association

"Meaning of life? Oh, you want my brother. Third mountain over on my right. Me, I'm just a hermit."

"Relax, at your age it's perfectly natural to make groaning noises every time you move a body part."

Early emojis

Liv Ullmann

How Scientists Work

"Dad, I misbehaved at school again, so my teacher sent me home with a bill for her therapy."