Sign Sage T-Shirts

One way only.

Caution - Sign partly concealed by bush

A little help.

"Finally, after years of work, irrefutable proof that I'm a nerd."

'Anything you can compute I can compute better. I can compute anything better than you.'

"I got all 'Cs', but I call that an 'A' report card...'A' for 'Average.'"

"So have you ever stopped to ask yourself: If he really knew the secrets of the universe, would he be living in a damn cave?"

"Quantum Physics"? How am I going to learn all of this stuff? A bit at a time?

A book reviewer reads between the margins.

'My teacher said the school has tough new standards and I need to improve my vocabulary. What's 'vocabulary'?'

'Ere-we distinctly asked for SAM an' Ella!'

One can hardly be expected to solve the riddle of existence without a computer

"You've done it - you've come up with the perfect password."

The chairman's boat springs a leak: 'Just keep bailing and never mind the wisecracks.'

"Do I look like a wise man to you?"

"Anything you say, Mr. Einstein, can be used to explain the origin of the universe."

'Stop gritting your teeth!'

The chip - Loyal worker, tireless teacher, friend

"Rough year?" (2021 new year baby asking 2020 old year man)

"...At what point do hemorrhoids become 'just another hobby?'"

"It's nice of you to say so, Ben, but somehow the idea of 'Shakespeare in the Park' doesn't really appeal to me."

The past only looks good when you're living in the present.

'Wh-h-hatz-u-upp, dude?'

'Maybe I'm not a failure — maybe I'm just a late bloomer!'

'There goes Mr. Negativity.'

Liv Ullmann

"Don't be discouraged. Do it over, monitor the results...write your paper."

"Meaning of life? Oh, you want my brother. Third mountain over on my right. Me, I'm just a hermit."

"It's not real meditation when you SMIRK like that!"

Early emojis

"It needs more old salt."

'How many potatoes to make a bottle of vodka?.'

Distilleries Association

"Relax, at your age it's perfectly natural to make groaning noises every time you move a body part."

How Scientists Work