Siege Simulator Gifts

Air boulder.

'We're gonna need a bigger moat...!'

Castle, Cafe + Gift Shop.

"Uh Oh! Jehovah's"

"Hurry up with that dictionary!"

'In the computer simulation he said he admired my candor and gave me a raise.'

'Just in case there is an accident.'

When cockroaches go unchecked.

'This paintball war has really spun out of control.'

"Hi, I designed this Sim Game and I'm checking on staff morale."

"That's the Press Corps Hospitality Tent. We had better get tooled up and make a start."

Office of Strategic Scenarios: 'Best case...Worst case.'

DING DONG!

'You can't pour the boiling oil over them yet - I'm still cooking the chips !'

Early Resentment Towards Yuppies.

'Our firewall barely protects our content.'

Tar umbrellas for sale at viking attack

Service Entry.

'One day we'll look back on all this, in a computer game.'

"They've deployed their new missile defense system."

"The Normans are coming and I can't decide on whether to pour a simple consomme on them, or a more complex bisque."

'...and why do they call this a 'battlement'?'

'I thought this thing had been tried and tested.' 'It has... Didn't work that time either.'

'You idiot! Two is aim, three is fire!'

Soldiers attempt to break into a castle with a credit card.

mars is flat.

Ambushing A Castle With A Giant Key.

The gaming world.

"The reason you can't move the little men around is because it's an ant farm."

"If marriage is so great how come you never hear about simulated marriage?"

Wii Childbirth

"Another miss, sir."

"I want to apologize for some of the remarks I made during the heat of battle."

"When your only tool is a trebuchet, every problem looks like a siege."