Sidewalk Snacker Gifts

"These are the best seats. Remember when they used to put us next to the bus stop?"

'The school bus drove off without me. The driver said she couldn't allow one more peanut butter sandwich on her bus.'

"This is our soft opening."

Super Heroes.

"5 chocolate brownies, 3 banana muffins, 4 caramel cookies and one cappuccino - skinny."

"Fresh pepper?"

Enjoying a picnic at the rugby ground

'When the doctor told you to warm up before exercising, I don't think he meant with hot chocolate and hot cross buns.'

"I was going to share my cookies with teddy, but he's on a diet....so I had to eat them all."

"I'm learning to appreciate the simple things in life."

"I didn't realize there was so many different kinds of vegetables!"

Sinking Sand

"You're the sport on my telly"

'I've decided to give up giving up!'

"I don't understand it - no matter how much I drink coffee, play on my phone, refresh my e-mail, look up things online, go to the kitchen for snacks, message my friends, scroll through Twitter, and play with the cats, I still can't get any writing done."

Fresh hamsters on a stick.

When Mrs Murray said you should vary your diet I don't think she meant to just try all 16 flavours of POT NOODLES.

"Since it's only 10am, I'll have coffee, strawberry, and maple in a waffle cone."

"I'm fairly sure you can't count jaffa cakes as one of your five a day."

Supermarket Aisles.

'You know, hors d'oeuvres are completely lost on your side of the family.'

"Dad, what is a meal?"

American 'Idle'.

"Have you ever thought about putting out, instead of pretzels, maybe peanuts?"

Working from home.

The individual cheese slice. Oddly, not the first choice for the truly individual.

Factory raised chickens. . .Free range chickens. . . Chickens that crossed the road.

"Man, I love roughing it out here... but this trail mix is making my fingers sticky!"

Seven Layers.

"I don't think you'll still be that 'Zen' when I tell you someone's nicked your cheese and pickle sandwich from the fridge."

'If I collapse there's a cherry danish in my lunchbox.'

'The only way to get rid of temptation is to yield to it!'

I can't find the artisanal Pop-Tarts.

"Gracie, you can't leave Animal Crackers all over the place!"

"Hell man, what whacko orders chips for their last meal?"