Sibling Squabble Strategist Gifts

"No, I'm not here for your little sister."

'No hair or teeth, can't walk or talk -- he's kind of a starter kit.'

'I am so proud: My kids are finally fighting all the time!'

'Don't write on that wall with crayons! It'll show up better on that wall over there.'

It's my biggest project - a database of all my sister's boyfriends.

"We tried to play nicely, but frankly it's not as much fun as tormenting each other."

The noise from the basement was probably nothing – but if it was, she was a sacrifice her older brothers were willing to make.

"Act your birth order!"

'No hair or teeth, can't walk or talk -- she's kind of a starter kit.'

'Baby sand shark eat their siblings.'

'This is Kevin O'Shea, my big sister's answering service.'

"You can't live in our basement. Your brother beat you to it."

'I suppose this puts my new bike on the back burner?'

'Stop crying or Mom will think we're not having fun!'

'MOM! -- Samantha called me names in her diary!'

"How many times do I have to tell you to quit going through your little brother!"

'No hair or teeth, can't walk or talk -- he's kind of a starter kit.'

'Mom! - Jeffrey just said a DADDY word!!'

'Take it from someone with experience. . . you can't go throwing tantrums until you've at least tossed a few.'

Brother and sister at the dentist

Little Brother for Sale, 'I don't care what he did!'

"Don't worry, and don't listen to your brother! You can't really smell fear: it's just an expression..."

'The only reason I take him with me wherever I go, is because the thought of kissing him goodbye makes me feel sick!'

'How do you figure?'

'I told my Mom either the sitter goes, or I go!'

'What...you just sold your little sister?!'

'No, the Patriot Act doesn't make it all right for you to read your sister's diary!'

"Evelyn, Leslie, Marion, Tracy, and I, Carroll, want to know why our baby brother will get to be named Jeff."

"I'm wearing new cologne. I hope Smiley is able to control herself around me today."

Pterodactyl Pteenagers.

Mom! Billy's censoring me!

'He's bitten me for the last time!'