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'That was absolutely HORRIBLE! When can you start?'

Stage hand.

Trial by Media

Showbiz Awards

"And by president we mean the one on Saturday night tv, not the real one. He kinda sucks."

'Gosh, really? You've never been on any reality show at all?'

'A sitcom has to be quirky or formulaic. There is no middle way.'

America's Funniest Interest Rate Hikes

"Here's the deal, boys. We need to see a little more bickering. We're doing a Reality Show."

'-Not THE Queen Vic?'

Comic,,,Drama,,,Laugh Track,

'It's a program on paranoia. Every time I leave the room, they stop and wait for me to come back.'

"Boss, I guarantee you that my intentions with your daughter are serious."

"I'll be glad when the television is fixed."

"I love being your agent, Nick, but the guys making the really big bucks now are the managers. Let me be your manager."

"We both see Ben as this summer's breakout child."

Music Hall Dancers

"No Hand Sanitiser"

'I'm a star!'

"Is it 'Measure once, cut twice?' Or 'Cut once, then measure?' Or maybe it's..."

The 24-Hour Celebrities Doing Something Stupid Channel.

Cleaner cleaning under the feet of the dancers as they perform

Hollywood producer.

'I'm not a magician, but I do keep live doves in my pants.'

Situation Tragedy.

Comedy, Tragedy, Karaoke

"Face it - in this town, either you're a star or you're just another brown dwarf."

'What a strange episode -- they just voted Ricardo Montalban off the island!'

Animal Actors

War Heros Variety Night (playing a tune on his medals).