Shortcut Enthusiast T-Shirts

'Hello tech support? When I simultaneously press CTRL, TAB, ALT, NUM Lock, and Page Up keys, my fingers hurt.'

"I think we could work very well together."

"Sorry we’re late, but apparently the journey of 1,000 miles begins with 'I know a shortcut around this traffic'."

'Well, I'm a barber at a military base and vehemently disagree!'

"Would you read this self-help book to me?"

"You want some words of wisdom? Next time, take the elevator!"

'Here's something that should suit your wooden acting style. How do you fancy playing the lead in Pinocchio?'

'Yep,that's it Mr.White. And NOW go, Control-Alt-Delete, then re-enter.'

'It's just some Pour 'n' Serve, Stir 'n' Blend, Bake 'n' Slice, Mix 'n' Broil and Chop 'n' Simmer.'

Hollywood producer.

"It's supposed to be a comedy, so I've had Steve, here, red-flag the funny parts."

"It's my family's special recipe, passed down through generations on the cream cheese package."

"What are they complaining about?... The local content is the audience...

"He's left a suicide screenplay."

'A series based on made-up stories with actors following scripts? Preposterous.'

'It's 'big office' meets 'poorly-received flop'!'

Subtitles for the Stupid

"Sure, it's a little formulaic but I love it!"

Organ transport team

"Just got the script from the focus group. Fabulous!"

"Instead of taking notes, can I just purchase a transcript of today's lesson?"

Write a Screenplay

Man taking a shortcut to centre of a maze

'I ran the mile in two minutes. I took a short cut.'

'I'm writing a screenplay that every studio in Hollywood will want to produce. It's about an honest, hard-working, moral CEO.'

"Oh, pardon me. That's not the menu , that's my screenplay."

This is the shortcut!

Christopher Fry.

'Nah! He's not my type.'

Dustin Lance Black

'Reckless Rick has already lost three matches this year, but rumor has it that he's looking for a new writer...'

"If you'd bullshitted your work like the rest of us, you'd be home by now."

'Whatever you do, don't push: 'control', 'alt;, 'anvil'.'

'You and your shortcuts.'

"Look, darling, I've recorded your favourite meal."