Shipwreck Survivor Pillows

'I'm sorry I didn't practice this week, Mrs. Tinklemeyer. I just had so many distractions!

Sinking cruise ship, with band member saved by floating on cello.

"Have you been tested?"

'Petersen, you're fired!'

Man arrives at desert island to find Summer Fete taking place: How many shells in the jar Guess the name of the Starfish

Talking to rats - "One more crack about my seamanship and you're off the captains table."

'Look Reg, a ship...we're saved!'

'Oh, that's just great. It's not bad enough I'm stranded here. Now I'm trapped in an invisible box.'

'Are you boycotting any product at the moment?'

External Revenue Service

"Shut up, you're driving me crazy! Shut up, you're driving me crazy! Shut up ..."

'I don't have a lock! I hate to leave my bike unlocked overnight!'

Cruise ship's captain complains God didn't save his hat.

'The sun is up. What do you feel like doing today?'

A man with a rake on a desert island

'Ever slept on a waterbed before?'

'Sally, there's someone else.'

'A single man, on an island full of girls... Well, aren't you the lucky one?'

"I don't believe you have nothing to declare. I'll have to ask you to consent to a strip search."

"It's hard to believe this is the Atlantic. It looks very much like he Pacific."

Castaway stranded on a desert island gets run down by a ship

"Do you think we should water it?"

"I just feel like a cliche."

"It's over, Ted - there's someone else!"

Bl**dy climate change...

Barber Needed

Castaway sees sign on desert isle: 'Keep off the grass'.

"I'm leaving you, Sidney."

'I didn't think I stood an earthly with all those gorgeous girls around the ship's pool!'

My bad.

Desert Island - Closed for refurbishment.

Stork delivering a baby to a desert island.

Desert Island Bagpipes

'I could kill myself for having eight cups of coffee this morning.'

'Go on then, leave, I don't care. I knew when we got married you was a nutcase...'