Ship Skipper T-Shirts

'What type of line are you using?'

"The universe is expanding! Of course I'm expanding too!"

'Nothing impacts my lifestyle choices more than a veterinarian with a scale.'

A massive ship pulls in in Central Park.

Captain steering house through flood.

New company policy...next time you miss a meeting I need a note from a doctor or a subpoena from a judge.

Rock - see you in a million years!

A private jet takes off

Sea weed harvest.

'Don't be so dramatic and get into my office!'

Captain looks out of a porthole and notices that the ship is sinking.

Frontispiece to 'Dombey and Son'

Lighthouse Beam.

Remote controlled car on a boat.

Lifesaver!

Ship upsidedown in a bottle has rescue boat in bottle next to it.

'May I speak to you alone, Cap'n?'

'I heard that the new captain was raised on a farm.'

Distractions.

"No, I said to swab the deck!"

Lighthouse powered by batteries.

A spa bath at Mapledurham.

'If we took the boat out, it might get dirty or scratched. Can't we sit here for the next several hours and talk about why you accused me of being paranoid?'

"Well, we've learned that passengers will mutiny if they are served meatloaf two days in a row... Even if you do call it the South Sea Surprise on the second day!"

"According to the charts, it should be clear sailing after this."

"I forget who, but he's somebody's kid."

Dead Men Tell No Tales.

"Miss Jones, cancel my 3:30pm"

'Maybe we should've let that one pass.'

"Don't trust his tail—I know a scallywag when I see one."

"Warning! Not to be used as a life saving device."

'Attention!! All hands on deck!'

'I told my teacher that I won't be returning to school. I'm trying out for a pro basketball team, and her services are no longer required.'

"Sure, I'll give you a second opinion. I don't think you should stay home from school either."

'Your iceberg salad, Captain!'