Shield Wielder Enthusiast Gifts

Kellyanne Conway

Bird feeding chick that is nesting in a knight's helmet

"You are being overly-defensive again, Brenda!"

Mister Bundles VS. The Martians - Part Twenty Six

"My girlfriend really went all out on this one."

Wouldn't it be cool if we could live in the Middle Ages, Randy? We could roam the countryside on horses and carry swords. We could hang out in taverns and drink ale, maybe earn enough coin to hire a hero … Then we could go on a quest. Maybe slay some golems. I think it's a real sign of intellectual maturity that we haven't even mentioned maidens yet. Real Middle-Ages maidens would eat you for breakfast.

Before putting on your armor...always check for mice!

Martial Arts

"And finally, I implore the jury not to take my clients lack of alibi and blatant lies out of context."

'Carry on sailor, just keep swimming around the coast and stick your head up now and again.'

Progress?

"Sheesh... Missed a button again."

Joan of Arc goes sword shopping.

Wilbert wished he's taken those karate classes instead.

'So you have to ask yourself: do you feel lucky?...well do you, monk?'

"When are you going to learn to put your shield up when you're flying at tree top level?"

Martial Arts

'Iraq had no WMD's? Iran has no nukes? Surely there must be some terror-producing country to keep Americans frightened, and in support of big defense spending!'

A hunter hitting his first bird.

'I take it this is your first big game hunt?!!'

'I fell out of my treestand but fortunately nothing got hurt.'

'That's the new budget team that came on board last week!'

'Don't tell anyone I asked... but why don't we have muskets?'

King Richard I

Gamma Ray Lab/Gamma Ray Shielding Materials Lab

'Watch it, I'm a black belt.'

"Ohhh... He's out all right!"

"Wouldn't it be cool to live in the middle ages, Randy? We could roam the countryside on horses and carry swords?"

"I can assure you, Your Honor, that my client knocked over the liquor store with the best of intentions."

What?

Ancient Weapons

Knight/Bird.

No one liked working the red-eye shift.

"I don't like the looks of this! That's our jury consultant!"

During a round of throwing stuff the boomerang emerges.