Shear Genius T-Shirts

'How long has it been since you had a shearing?'

'He's the best sheepdog I ever had.'

"It's called geometry, Mum."

'Everyone's using your theorem, Pythagoras. I told you you should have patented it.'

'So when the bottom fell out of sheep shearing I had to find something else...'

"Well yes, I was shorn by the apprentice, but I don't mind really: everybody has to learn somehow..."

'Sheep striptease'.

"Just a trim and tidy-up, please."

"Don't stress. My philosophy has always been 'ewe be ewe.''"

"Painted like this, finding furniture to match at least one colour should be simple!"

Celebrating Spring Can Be Shear Hell

"Well. It DOES make you look thinner."

"The downside of living in the wild is that I need to shear myself now. Boy, do I now appreciate the skill professional shearers have: it's hard!"

"What if we stow the 'Star Wars' crap for five seconds, Timmy, and get to the geometry?"

'Just the usual, thanks.'

Sinking cruise ship, with band member saved by floating on cello.

'Yeah, they're neat tattoos, but they're only visible at shearing time each year...'

'I thought you said you'd done this before.'

"Behold the geometry of pizza: square, circle and triangle."

This sucker was pretty clogged. Found lots and lots of wool. Yes sir, yes sir - looks like about 3 bags full.

'I wrote a software program and sold it for two million dollars.'

Focoso - to sing with fire and passion.

'Abandon Sheep.'

'Every year I say, 'Just a little of the top' but they never listen.'

Mime trying to buy a doughnut

"Anything for the weekend?"

Woolverine.

'I can hack into any website, but those child-proof bottle caps are still a challenge!'