Shark Aficionado Gifts

"No! No! I swear I didn't say nothing!"

'Trust me. ... The shark will be attracted by your distress, but it will ignore you and go for the little chunk of tuna on my hook.'

Shark Surfing the Waves.

"So many acquisitions lately ... should we be worried?"

Divers attache BITE ME sign to companion's oxygen tanks.

"The best beaches are Santa Cruz, Hossegor, Ericeira, The Gold Coast, Barbados, Sennen Cove, Oahu and Bali son: They're full of surfers..."

"Honestly, Edna, he just wasn't worth it!"

'Man eater?! No way, it was just a nibble!'

Cowardly man recommends a shark attack his wife.

'Gee, this used to be such a kick - What the heck; it's a living.'

'I think he wants you to play ball!'

I know it's cheating, but you have to admit it's pretty clever!

We never go out!

"Oh you had to cross the cattle grid, didn't you?!"

"I never should have eaten that third license plate."

Suddenly the sharks began to circle – but then, they always circled.

"Me, I don't nip swimmers anymore: I can't stand the sunscreen aftertaste..."

"They gutted the herring, filleted it and stuffed it into a bun with onions?! Man, I love horror movies!"

"Dad, Dad, cage divers! Get the hacksaw and let's scare the heck out of them!"

"From downtown...the shark scores!"

Myrtle learns a fatal lesson about swimming during a certain time of the month.

"So I said 'Hey, not everybody likes jokes about shark-fin soup.' And? Oh, he apologized right away. Good! That was super-insensitive. No kidding! That's exactly what I said before I ate him."

"... And that one I tickled to death."

"That's the beauty part, when you buy an island the sharks come with it."

(The Sharks: Cartoonist Gahan Wilson Nets a Fin-Filled School of Macabre sea Denizens.)

"Little Jamie would like you both to know that he's now into sharks."

"Follow me and I'll make you 'fishers of men'!"

"I'll have a man overboard!"

'I'll have the surfer on a board, lightly sauteed.'

'I hate all that hip hop music.' 'Yes, I'd rather play golf or watch cricket.' 'Oh no...great white sharks.'

'You go ahead and eat. I'm on a raw food diet and surfer isn't part of it.'

"Never trust a lone shark."

'And get this: just when I thought the worst was over, the media blasts me for 'opportunistic, predatory business tactics!' Boy, did THAT sting!'

'Tha thwimmer I ate wa thotally drunk...'

"What's the problem? Never seen a shark's tooth earing before?"