Shamrock Seeker T-Shirts

'Think I preferred the old Irish barman.'

"And, when the DNA test results arrived, the woman realized her so-called 'little terrier mix' had been part German shepherd all along."

'The new lad's collecting shells again boss.'

Hermit Crabapple Tree

'He's the best sheepdog I ever had.'

St. Patricks Day Shamrock Outfit

"The boys at Jack's Bait & Tackle will never believe this one!"

"Goodness! These tomatoes look so good!"

Silver Fox

"What I mean is what do you do with yourself all day?"

'Why can't you collect shells like the other kids?'

"If you need anything in the building, just call the super. This is the only known photo of him."

'It's grossed over a billion dollars. Let's go see the Titanic wreck.'

Real Estate Personals

"No guarantees, right?"

"Cheer up Skip - worse things happen at sea..."

"The legend is true. Bigger Foot exists."

'Music hath charms,' &c.

Welcome to a Sleepy Little Town - name available on request.

Myths and Other Urban Legends

"The downside of living in the wild is that I need to shear myself now. Boy, do I now appreciate the skill professional shearers have: it's hard!"

"Everybody's just a teensy bit in love with me. How about yourself?"

"Are you willing to relocate?"

'Good morning Miss...'

'What's the night life-like?

"You have no idea how refreshing it is to meet someone raffish in West Hartford."

be my valentine

"It's your mother calling."

"No, I don't recycle."

"Mr. Peanut is my dad—you can call me Rick."

'Say '1' to hear the ocean in English. Decir '2' a oir el ocean en Espanol.'

Happy Birthday

"That's way out of my price range..."