Sewer System Enthusiast Gifts

'How'd I get here? All I remember is a great flushing noise, years ago.'

' ... and this is the half bath.'

Ofwat Sewage Scrutiny

"I guess it's too late to warn you that I turned off the hot water."

"Don't worry. Mum and Dad think I'm just talking to my invisible friend."

We built your beds, planted, mulched and set up your watering system. Nice work! Here's your check. Thanks! I love gardening. Me, too!

A sudden draft. The moment he first felt comfortable calling himself a plumber.

'My phone's been tapped!'

"I'm afraid your bath is directly connected to the melting polar ice caps."

'Sewer farm - 100% organic'

Hi, sign a petition for better working conditions? Hello, sign a petition for better working conditions?

"The beginning of another urban legend."

'Here's the problem,the pilot light went out.'

'I've been having a lot of out of potty experiences, lately.'

"I'm charging extra to remove the duct tape you thought would work."

'My client is therefore NOT guilty of malpractice. All he is guilty of is an error in judgment. He should have decided to be a plumber."

I hate it when they start without us.

"You'll find a day in the sewage treatment plant will do wonders for you."

Yo, Twitchy

"Good news! Our septic tank is shot."

Sewage Farm, "Bloody Hell, Crap Circles."

'That's your limescale problem sorted.'

'Gee,that's an unusual assortment! What kind of buttons are those? 'Belly...'

'Ok, who didn't leave a faucet to drip so the pipes wouldn't freeze!'

I have a low flow toilet ... but not by design.

"You should have called earlier."

"So, as you can see, health care is so complicated you may never get well."

History Class Moved to Room 318. The class relocated because of this mess. The pipe breaking was a "history changing" event.

'Mom, I said if you want to live in this neighbourhood, keep a weapon at your disposal.'

"This place is perfect. It must have been built for us."

"This city is in trouble. It smells better down here."

"If I can't be a plumber's apprentice, can I be a plumber's helper?"

'I don't want to go up after Yang's dad.'

"Look - an urban legend."

"Even our job has its own small mercies."