Sew-tastic Fashionista Pillows

'It's good of you to go out of your way to show me what not to do, Mum.'

I quilt therefore I am

"Too 'Book of Genesis'?"

Mikado

'I'm looking for something to impress the shareholders.'

'It's good of you to go out of your way to show me what not to do, Mum.'

"Actually, I think you looked better WITH a beard."

Carioca

"Now that's a great number if you want to be protected from the entire environment."

"Tia Carmen, can you make a new dress for my doll?"

"Didn't your last blouse fall apart in two days?"

"I don't think anyone will notice your ninty seven pound lime green lycra swimming trunks Terry."

'I'm just curious, which one of you was dropped off by their boyfriend on a really fast motorcycle?'

Bernice Mountain Dog

Falloon's Menswear. Where it's always brown trouser time.

'He agreed that she might have a point.'

'I knew there was part of the pattern missing!'

"Marie Antoinette? This is she."

"Remember, you're selling home appliances, so look more ... dishwashery."

Naked Furniture

Crocodile Shoes

Australian punk

Pollsters

Zorro, The Embroiderer

Bertie Wooster type teaching a parrot to talk

A woman repairs a broken heart.

"Look what I found, this beautiful Christmas poncho. Isn't it festive?!"

"I blacked out for ten minutes this morning - Then I realised I had put my hoodie on backwards."

'Just a minute, I forgot something.'

Joe's Tuxedos

Emma's Bridal Wear: Gowns Veils Trains

"Have they decided not to have M-day."

"Would you like to come up for a margarita?"