Service Savant T-Shirts

"I'm Todd, your waiter, and I'd like you to think our friendship is more than contextual."

'Coming to you direct from table nine; 'the polenta is cold'.'

"It's new. It's called a pre-tip. You pay me now and I'll actually bring your food before it's cold!"

'Well, now that I know he's the owner's son, yes, he's the best damned wine steward I've ever seen.'

'Waiter, your tip's getting cold.'

'You'll be asked to rate my service after the meal, so could you give me a little hint just how much you expect from me?'

"I'm sorry...I need to speak with someone with a little authority around here."

"Baldo, in this business, customer service is everything. People know when you're lying! So the golden rule is always be sincere...where or not you mean it."

Great customer care is not optional.

"Once I connect with my server over there, I can turn my lamp on and off."

I did it my way.

TV-Man

"Jimmy, I want you to meet our new safety officer."

Where was I?

'Okay, okay, be patient!'

Fred interpreted the word compact as a verb, not as an adjective.

'Theaters from Hell' 'We have no sound engineers, so no there's not a good seat in the house.'

Despite the economic downturn, sales are as good as ever.

'Who cares what she thinks? Grow a pair and buy the damn thing.'

'Sell South Africa!'

"So we've managed to consolidate all our multinational 24 hour hotline support centres down to one Single Point of Contact... and here he is."

'He's a media consultant. He came with the multimedia software package.'

'Let me through - I've a bargain for a nose!'

The Plasmas.

'As far as we can tell, the system went down because someone stepped on a crack in the sidewalk.'

"We can deliver it Tuesday. If no one's home, we'll just slip it under the door."

The company's marketing strategy became increasingly sophisticated.

"We don't believe in miracles. We rely on them."

'Computers' 'Hardware' 'Software'

The Music Lover.

"Every good scene in that move was in the coming attractions...why did we even bother to come watch it?"

"I recently upgraded my resume-writing software."

'When did we lose our targeted audience status?'

"We kiss a lot of frogs so that you find your prince."

Mind control