Service Industry Participant Pillows

"So, you want me to go all the way back to the kitchen just to get you a menu...? Couldn't I just give you a link to our, online menu?!"

"This is our soft opening."

"I think you should be aware that the chef is a summer intern."

"The UWS association for the advancement of A.I."

'Would you like a balloon with that?'

'The customer is always right...'

"I'm working part time, but I'm hoping that once I finish my master's they'll up my hours to full time."

"He's my cousin. It's just until he can find a new restaurant to work in."

"An actor ... huh, that’s funny, because you look just like a waiter."

"Stick to the specials and no one gets hurt."

'Not for what I'm getting paid!'

"Would you like to see a dessert menu or do you not need a little treat after each meal?"

"Your confirmation number is 7913842461. To hear this information again press 1."

'A tiny kitchen, one cook, and great food...I don't know how they do it.'

"You're right, Pierre, they are licking their plates."

"Be careful, this plate is… never mind."

Complaints clerk to consumer: A hair in your TV dinner? Maybe it belongs to a celebrity!

'Having a family life and juggling two jobs? Isn't that a contradiction in terms?'

"This robot barista is so authentic it even got my name wrong."

The King of Salesmen says 'Why sir, I believe you need a new tie.'

Lunch-Hour Highlights

"Hello, my name is Eddie and I will be your customer tonight."

"Isn't it enough we tip well? Must we also like him on Facebook and follow him on Twitter?"

I'm only a part-time waiter, I'm really an actor.

"We ran out of the little umbrellas."

'We are not responsible for any coats that might fit a member of staff.'

How to become the perfect waiter. Lesson 83.

Outsaucing - A dollop of sauce has been put on a customer's plate from a long arm from afar.

Top four least favorite summer camps of 2008.

Too rare perhaps?

"I read that 40% of us have to take a second job just to make ends meet...It's a disgrace!"

'Our compliments to the dishwasher.'

"I know it's hard to shift gears coming here from your day job as an editor, but the customers don’t like their drinks watered down."

'Will that be for here or to go - and if it's to go, can you take me with you?'

"Allow Me"