Service Industry Participant Gifts

"So, you want me to go all the way back to the kitchen just to get you a menu...? Couldn't I just give you a link to our, online menu?!"

"This is our soft opening."

"The UWS association for the advancement of A.I."

"I think you should be aware that the chef is a summer intern."

'Would you like a balloon with that?'

'The customer is always right...'

"I'm working part time, but I'm hoping that once I finish my master's they'll up my hours to full time."

"He's my cousin. It's just until he can find a new restaurant to work in."

"An actor ... huh, that’s funny, because you look just like a waiter."

"Stick to the specials and no one gets hurt."

'Not for what I'm getting paid!'

'Having a family life and juggling two jobs? Isn't that a contradiction in terms?'

"Your confirmation number is 7913842461. To hear this information again press 1."

Complaints clerk to consumer: A hair in your TV dinner? Maybe it belongs to a celebrity!

'A tiny kitchen, one cook, and great food...I don't know how they do it.'

"Would you like to see a dessert menu or do you not need a little treat after each meal?"

"Be careful, this plate is… never mind."

"You're right, Pierre, they are licking their plates."

"This robot barista is so authentic it even got my name wrong."

Lunch-Hour Highlights

"We ran out of the little umbrellas."

I'm only a part-time waiter, I'm really an actor.

"Hello, my name is Eddie and I will be your customer tonight."

'We are not responsible for any coats that might fit a member of staff.'

How to become the perfect waiter. Lesson 83.

Outsaucing - A dollop of sauce has been put on a customer's plate from a long arm from afar.

'We're well known for serving only the freshest mineral water, Madame.'

"I read that 40% of us have to take a second job just to make ends meet...It's a disgrace!"

'Will that be for here or to go - and if it's to go, can you take me with you?'

"I know it's hard to shift gears coming here from your day job as an editor, but the customers don’t like their drinks watered down."

'Our compliments to the dishwasher.'

We Offer Fast, Friendly Or Quality Service! "So, which one do you want?"

'No, I'm not wearing high heels. I look taller because the minimum wage will increase and now I can stand taller.'

Too rare perhaps?