Server Sympathizer Gifts

"Wait, you never wash your cape?"

'I don't want this job. I worked all my life and retired. I like being retired.'

I've been feeling sluggish lately.

'Geoffrey's Tourette's is acting up.'

"I'm sorry I hurt your feelings. Here, try this."

'Here's my report card and here's my personal disclaimer.'

'Do I have to enter a plea?'

'Thank you, sir. NEXT, PLEASE!'

'If you can hear me, Larry Gligstein, please send a text to 555-703-7193

'Could you bring me the new investment regulations you downloaded yesterday?' 'It's still downloading.'

'Our server is so slow I'm going to call him 'Dial-Up'.'

"This test wasn't fair! No way it's an accurate measure of what I know!"

Snail to Slug.

Scary Slug Stories

Neighbourhood watch and slug watch.

'I never get tipped!'

'I'm happy to say that both parties agree on the issue. It's got bi-partisan non-support.'

"It's father, doctor, he's creaking badly."

Now, this is a good garden: full of weeds! The likelyhood of somebody trying to poison us here is very low...

'Spinning the web is the fun part, after that, it's just waiting and waiting for a catch...'

"Brian says in 1976 we just got on with it."

'There it is again...that mysterious feeling that we're clipped from a newspaper and hung on someone's refrigerator.'

"You rang. . . ?"

"Don't do it! You've got so much to live for!"

'And then the jury decided that I was ready for a long term relationship with the penal code system.'

Bug on the windshield.

"Well, it's just the way it is: Humans don't like us, and if we wander in their vegetable gardens, they try to poison us!"

A bug memorial on car grill.

'I said, 'Take it with a grain of salt.' He took it literally.'

"Well, they always say it's the thought that counts!"

"Save my phone!"

"Nevermind how fast I was going – you made me spill my cereal!!"