Serpent Supporters Pillows

"Now ladies, I hope none of you have been cheating."

'What do you do with the time you save?'

Mrs. Claus has a ladies night out.

Filming Christmas

Santa Dog

"Stop blaming yourself. You loved, and dedicated so much of your time. Have you considered getting another cactus?"

'Ok you two, where the hell is Dancer?!'

Meet Santa's entourage

SNAKE CHARMER: snake reads 'help wanted' ad.

"When I gave up cookies for the period of fasting called Lent, I thought it would be an hour, like the period of school called math."

"Who cares what little kids think? What's important is that you believe in yourself."

The Cactus Reader

'Snob, he won't eat domestic slugs, just imports.'

The Great Maldini and his Venomous Snakes

'First she called my mother, and then she called Santa.'

'I've tied a knot to remind you to feed him.'

"All I want for Christmas is a previous little Kitty cat."

Snake Eats the Snake Charmer.

'They think I can walk on water.'

'I'm looking for something, like, 364 days a year.'

A serpent is entering and exiting cloth in an interesting fashion.

Ophiologist

Notice! Due to COVID, all reindeer games are postponed indefinitely.

'Cleanliness is next to...impossible.'

"Of course I was speeding - how else am I going to visit billions of households in one night?!"

Elf and Safety: 'Have you got a seat belt on that thing?'

'Do what I did. Tell your mother you want a pet snake. Then she'll get you a dog.'

Snake Blogging

The Multi-tasking Snake Charmer

Santa Claus Heralding the New Year

"So, little Andy is a lawyer now!"

"I told you not to show Santa those rodeo videos!"