Serial Staller Pillows

The Procrastinatorium.

"Have you tried binge-watching a show together?"

"I met him on an online dating site. He was on their 'return' section."

'It's midnight, do you know where your brain is?'

TV-Man

"At least their bull sessions are green. Everything they say is 100% biodegradable."

'She got all the soap opera channels at a discount -- it's some kind of 'frequent cryer' program.'

'This has a great ending...he shoots her.'

'Hold on, there might be someone more interesting on the other line...'

I'm no longer welcome at the county fair.

Stress Prison - The fictional jail you imagine being sent to so you can catch up with Netflix and reading.

Bummer Time Streaming

'A new study of people who watch television all the time reveals some shocking facts....'

'You realize, of course, there's nothing wrong with me. . . I'm only here 'cause of your 50%-off-first-visit coupon and I am not a serial bargain shopaholic.'

'Tell me, Sadie -just how many times is it now that we have been gathered here today?'

Attention: Due to a lack of interest we have dropped the APATHY channel - Sorry for any inconvenience.

You finished Netflix

'I watch shows I don't like because I can't find the remote.'

"Your daughter has 'I have something to share' syndrome."

'Scanning articles without finishing them on the Internet is affecting you. You're not finishing anything.'

"They went together, doctor!"

'Let me put it this way...don't start watching any miniseries on TV.'

'Come on, Raymond, we haven't reached our credit limit yet!'

"I thought you gave up TV."

New TV Season...Dopey man watching new TV shows

"I'm in the mood to swipe left on everything."

Mavis didn't realise she was still on hold. . . !

'The following program was made possible by canceling an even WORSE program.'

"The doctor says you can go home. We'll get cable."

"No, I'm really into this series. I am just not into you making a very poor attempt at copying their British accent every waking minute until we finish it."

"Do you recall how my eHarmony profile said I love to hike? Well, I lied."

"Jeanine, there's no one I'd rather binge-watch TV with in a desperate attempt to escape a world I find terrifying and perplexing than you."

"I think I need to diet. I have to binge watch just to look at all of me."

"Another diet?"

I just binge-watched a whole series on doing things in moderation.