Sensationalism Skeptic Pillows

"What's new?"

"To be honest, I don't believe in ghosts."

"If there were really a God, trees would come with outlets and wifi hubs."

"God works in mysterious ways."

"Dont believe anything those guys have told you. None of it. It's all B.S."

''Faith can move mountains'? -- That's actually a little disturbing.'

"I'm the black sheep of the family because I'm afraid of the dark."

'I hope there's something better on the 'other side'!..'

In a career limiting move, Reginald decided to give Albert's latest theory some frank and fearless feedback.

"Anyway, it turned out that god was a ruddy algorithm after all!"

'It may look that way... But actually, I'm an atheist

"and what are you giving up for lent, Reverend?" "Religion"

"Do I look like a wise man to you?"

'How do we know YOU'RE not bearing false witness?'

'Do I ever wonder about a higher power? No, I wonder what's on TV.'

'This one contains the commandments that will make people ENJOY life! Ha ha, just kidding.'

House of Wishful Thinking

"Huh! Never a miracle vaccine when you want one - then three come along at the same time - bloody typical!"

'Hey, what's with all this 'God forbid' stuff?'

"And that was the news. . . But please feel free to go online and vent your spite, spread your conspiracy theories and promote your ill-informed opinions. . ."

Actual Results May Vary

'Our financial statement was delivered 'postage due'. Think that's a sign?'

Alternative Accountants

'Jesus? Jesus who?'

'So it wasn't b*****t after all.'

"I did the math, and I'm telling you I have two left!"

'You've convinced me. I'm becoming an atheist.'

Rational explanations

'It's not an audition, it's a job interview and please don't tell me to 'break a leg'.'