Seminar Strategist Gifts

'Ladies and gentlemen, today we're going to get down to nuts and bolts.'

'If I had to use one word to describe our strategy.'

'And were there a point to your proposal, Henderson - What would it be?'

'Williams, we're not used to receiving such excellent ideas as these, so we'd like to tone them down a bit.'

The Businessmen Have to Make Decisions from Many Options

"You've got to fill in these forms to join the 'How to reduce bureaucracy' seminar."

"Yeah, but that one's a little bit hard to reach."

'Which 'win' is ours? Because the one on the left looks bigger.'

"I don't like getting bogged down in details. I'm more of a big-picture guy."

'It has come to my attention that we need to hedge against our five-year plan.'

Nothing Succeeds Like Confidence.

"Why won't you teach us how to handle complaints?"

"The trend in tough economic times is to put off everything that doesn't require immediate action ? as this chart shows."

'Smith, we need more creativity. You have to learn to think outside the box.'

"Here we are."

'Ah, Galagher, we made good use of your proposal.'

"Any questions?"

'Now, keep in mind that these numbers are only as accurate as the fictitious data, ludicrous assumptions and wishful thinking they're based upon!'

"Dammit, Johnson. You've got to start thinking outside of the box."

"...but the big question is, does the competition know that we don't know what we don't know?"

Empty box of ideas

'I want you to paddle against the current.'

"We have an acronym!"

"#Win!"

Eureka!

Bright idea

A presenter with a very complex chart to explain a business plan - 'And it's as simple as that!'

'Believe me, I know transformation isn't easy. I pulled a muscle once.'

"Is it just a scary coincidence that the words 'changes' and 'unknown' both have 7 letters?"

After a day long meeting, the decision, as usual, is made in the hallway.

'Dammit - how do we get in on that gross national product?'

'I think we'd be more confident about meeting our targets if we could work out what they were!'

"By the end of next week, these fads such as social media, automobiles and making fire will all be over."

"Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity."

'Our job will be to drag the competition down to our level.'