Seminar Savant Pillows

'I'll be away for a few days, sir - I'm attending a conference of conference organizers.'

Landing on your feet.

"Yes, we can hear well at the back, but I'd be happy to change seats with anyone who can't..."

Felix Mendelssohn

'I thought people were quite receptive to the change seminar.'

Sir Edward Elgar

'Who cares what she thinks? Grow a pair and buy the damn thing.'

Antonin Leopold Dvorak

'I can't believe it! This is when I sent out a company memo advocating a win-win philosophy.'

'I'm afraid turn out isn't as high as we'd expected...three of them misheard the date, five got the time wrong and everyone from marketing went to a hotel in Norwich by mistake.'

"We kiss a lot of frogs so that you find your prince."

I'm afraid we had to cancel the 'perfect planning' seminar. we forgot to book the hotel until it was to late and the speaker we'd hoped to use died in 1958

Anton Bruckner.

Computer grabs man and tells him to stop it.

'Before our principal addresses the faculty, there's something important that has to be said.'

"I'll recommend your book if you recommend mine."

"The lost password department's that way."

Annoucement

Benjamin Britten

Sergei Prokofiev.

'You can see concrete things, but not abstract things.'

Priest and mobile

"Remind me, what's the difference between a metaphor and a simile?"

Ludwig van Beethoven

'Alright! Alright! So I made a mistake!'

'Milton, you really did make it to the other side!'

"Like the boy scouts, Preacher; always prepared."

The apes make advances in grooming techniques.

Benjamin Britten.

'Where did he learn to carry a tune?'

Pub Quiz: 'I don't know much about history, don't know much biology ... but we'll be OK if there's a round on song lyrics.'

Change Management Seminar Changed to 7th Floor

"Why do I think you need glasses, Mr. Jones? For one thing...the chart is over this way!"

Afro hairdressing.