Semantic Explorer Gifts

"Bad news. It turns out we can't leave our bodies to library science."

"My job title is actually Dean of Semantics. Well, not semantics exactly. And yet, not not semantics either."

"According to mom the answers are all in this book!" "Too bad there's no pictures at which to look!"

Gracie's baby toys.

'I'm afraid it wouldn't work out, Kevin. You say 'data is' and I say 'data are'.'

"Definitive." "Compelling." "Persuasive." "Upside down."

'How do you stop a fish from smelling?'

"Nice design but you haven't quite mastered the technology!"

"Pride, Covetousness, Lust, Anger, Gluttony, Envy..."

"1972: Kim and Doug invited us to their key party... Sounds groovy! 2017: We just got an evite from Kim and Doug to join them on an ayahuasca retreat in Peru... Tommy starts hockey and my father is about to die—no way."

Lithium Fair

Body Systems

"With the latest in GPS technology embedded into my phone, who needs a map anymore?"

"Why 'Black Death'? Why not 'rodent-related'?"

Carl Wilhelm Scheele: "There was a great display of ores and minerals...I could not write with a molybdenite pencil."

Right way

"...I suggest we call it Greenspanium"

Thesaurus Editor, Overseer, Corrector, Improver, Modifier.

'No, fear isn't one of the basic taste sensations.'

Caveman at Computer

'You're trying to find yourself? -- No offense, but if I were you, I'd look for somebody ELSE.'

Man struggling to carry a giant tv remote control with hundreds of channels.

Body language interpreters - "He likes you and wishes to dance with you." "That's a get lost."

Thomas Aquinas

"The much ballyhooed era of TV interactivity took a step closer to reality today."

'Squid? They told me this was CALAMARI!'

Sensory confusion syndrome.

'You two will have lots in common - you share the same anxiety neurosis.'

Museum of Science. Periodic Table of Elements. Curie. Einstein. "Curium" is named after the Curies and "Einsteinium" is named after Albert Einstein --- Maybe they'll name an element after me one day! They can call it "delirium"!

Oxygen, hydrogen, carbon. With a combination like that you're bound to get infected.

'I know I am an inverted comma, but I still hate being quoted.'

'Now, with this system you can do the equivalent of running a steel mill - keeping track of the quality of the ore, domestic and foreign orders, smelting processes...'

Gift Cards In Hell

Maria Larosa

Inclusion of the word coronavirus in dictionary