Selfless Friend Gifts

'Personally, I don't like to play Fetch, but it makes him happy.'

"Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Yay!!! I died rich!"

Thrift: New way to eat eggs (avoid needless transport costs).

'That's what I thought, finances are tight: She's switched to no-name cat food...'

Priest

"I just..."

'It's cheaper than gas.'

Camel rider sees sign stating: The Next Mirage 16 miles.

'It's good to see you, Mr. McWit, but you do realize that today is neither Christmas or Easter?'

"We balanced our budget this month!"

"I think I can". (train)

'All this talk about a consumer society... I don't buy it.'

"We cancelled Netfix for this?"

GAS. If you have to ask, you probably can't afford it.

Piggy Bank Coin I.V.

'How much did you save this year?'

Kid praying: 'If it's okay with you, don't record this one.'

"Is that you nomad's answer to everything...ROAD TRIP?"

"My fellow mantises...I can barely believe this, but it has come to my attention that there is a lack of prayer in this church!"

"We're going to need more pets."

"So join me in prayer for those who are damned if they do and damned if they don't..."

"Don't judge me until you've walked a mile on my medication."

Buy Back the Junk We Bought at Your Garage Sale

"Oh, no! My bucket list!"

Boss, customers are asking why you've doubled prices. I'm just being fair. When the cost of coffee beans go up, everyone thinks I'm justified in raising the price of coffee. But cost increases come in all shapes and sizes. What about my new 80" tv? What about my new car note? What about my manservant I just imported from London? I dream of the day when all costs can be passed on to customers equally. Greed is not a civil right issue!

"Well, he loves people, the birds that fly, the fish that swim, and all the creatures of the forest."

"The company must save money. That's why we've got to be easy on the carpet."

Two men in T-shirts, one shirt says Jesus loves me, the other Jesus loves me more.

'I think we may have an income problem.'

"We've got a new financial advisor. I asked him how to cut down on out of pocket expenses and he said to stop wearing clothes with pockets."

"He's not gay, but he's often gay-adjacent."

'The gas bill is a lot bigger than usual.'

'It's an innovative way to boost attendance.'

'I invited God to be one of my friends on Facebook and he's turned me down!'

'He's studying to go to university' - Student reading book; 'HOW TO LIVE ON NO MONEY'