Self-sufficient Savant Pillows

DIY FE I really admire those guys. They're very self-sufficient.

"I wanted to plant my own food, but I couldn't find bacon seeds!"

"1. Flimsig used pallets, old foam 2. Stinkum goat wool 3. Beetup recycled lumber 4. Riskig kerosene lamp 5. Stupor hand blown by Nils 6. Smokum found on beach in Mendocino 7. Woblig 100% driftwood"

Nuclear generation of energy.

"Forget the allowance - I need a benefactor!"

"These latest surveys are very reassuring."

"He says he's not running away. . . he's just going off the grid."

"Their wedding registry has 8 place settings of double wall, stainless steel water bottles."

Reuse it or lose it.

'Doesn't bother me. All my money is in carbon-cleanup technologies.'

Complete Makeover

Recycle or ruin the planet?

'But we spend all our money creating toxic waste. We were hoping someone else would figure out how to detoxify it.'

'Turn we women loose in the malls - that'll stimulate the economy.'

"To heck with a husband... just help me find a dependable electrician."

Industries with clean energy

'As a rationalization specialist I actually have a concept to cut our deficit quickly and effectively - Just do a head stand'!

Magazines - All Special Green Issues.

"Okay...so I could have been wrong about a few facts..."

Friends of the Earth

Piggy Bank ATM

Energy Saving Conference.

'Very impressive, but is there anything you can't do?'

"I certainly hope you're composting the leftovers."

Green Lamp Lighting Monument

Recycling bin for iPads.

'Real? No. They're all made out of soy and tofu. We wanted to crack the meatless industry up a few notches.'

"It's been in self-drive mode all morning, maybe it's not programmed to recognise stop signs?"

"Living underground is not what it used to be."

'The forever stamps I purchased at 42 cents are now 44 cents. That's an annual apprciation of 2 which is more than you earned on your investment portfolio.'

Give a fly a bowl of soup and he'll eat for a day. Teach him how to use a crock-pot and he'll eat for a lifetime.

Akron, oh, you're on Ask Sadie. What's your problem?! I'm thinking of not signing up for health insurance this year. Good idea. In my day, there was no such thing as health insurance. If you got sick, you paid for it with either money or chickens. That's if you were a lily-livered coward who just had to see a doctor. When great-great-grandmother Cohen had her sixth heart attack, she just applied a poultice made of chestnut leaves and flour and kept on plowing.

"Unclean demon, in the name of the saint I command you to leave the spirit of this man and to take from him his unholy desire to drive an SUV!"

"And when you've saved up enough money, what are you going to say in in your full-page ad in the New York Times?"

"Teach a man to fish, and he'll know how to fish."