Self-portrait Fan Gifts

'Are you sure every artist paints himself?'

"The Selfie."

Introducing... The Everything Else Morning-After Pill!

Two vending machines for fisherman: 'Live Bait' next to 'Dead as a Doornail Bait'

The Sculptor

"Ok, maybe this isn't happening."

"I attended a leadership seminar, they learnt a lot from me."

'His ego needs lipo suction!'

Kobe Bryant

The trick to losing weight is to eat a small portion and wait 10 minutes. By then your resolve has caught up with your appetite!

Clown Painting in Museum

"I worry that some people find me boring"

'Have you considered drawing other people?'

1870: The accidental invention of 'the selfie'.

'This one is from my pre-arts grant period'

"Travel changed me."

Development of disgusting new flaws. Loving acceptance of your flaws.

Specialising in Multiple Personality Disorder

"You're so vein."

"They may be champagne problems, but they're my problems."

A woodpecker fashions a statue of a woodpecker.

Book reading a work titled: 'How to be self-reflexive.'

Only a handful of people are this small.

Dorian Gray views a Selfie

'Boy, you're really into yourself, aren't you?'

"Narcissus! Pay attention!"

'Plastic Surgery, come as you are and leave as you wish'

It would have placed him alongside such greats as Da Vinci and Van Gogh, but then, on a whim, he decided to add some stink lines.

The filming of CEOs Gone Wild

Attention seeker's anonymous.