Self-learner Pillows

Information

Self-Taught.

"This could be the year someone actually goes up there."

'I finished my homework, and half my college freshman courses.'

'I'm in the den, mom, reading the newspaper for my social studies class.'

Repulse Monkey. Difficult position, but one day it may save your life. Get it right!

'I can beat my own drum but it'll be counting on your to toot my horn.'

"Thanks to the Internet, I learned to ride a bike. Since I was bored, I also got my pilot's license."

'Relax, dad, I haven't been in a classroom for months because all my college classes are online!'

'I'm sorry Timmy, but if I keep going for help, you'll never learn to take care of yourself,'

'It's not my fault that I've developed habits that cannot be sustained.'

'However hard I try to lose weight, it always finds me again.'

'Miss, I think I've learnt all I can too.'

'Wow, that sounds rigorous. What are the prerequisites for living in my mom's basement?'

'When I googled myself, and nothing came up, I began to question my own existence!'

"You want self-motivation? Look! I have my own carrot and stick!"

Tiddles completes his doctorate.

A Classicist Considers Taking Up The Mambo

". . . and I wish he's shut up for a few minutes!"

'Your father is having a tough time with his online course.'

"The operation was a success. Thank goodness for YouTube videos!"

Big Man Off Campus

'Please do not ask for change.'

"I'm sorry, Dad. What I did was really stupid, selfish and wrong."

"Don't sweat the small stuff."

"You're too self-critical."

"Right now I'm his apostle, but my dream is to someday be my own Messiah."

Buddy hadn't learned from the time his tongue got stuck.

"I took your advice and went on a strict month-long diet, but I only lost 30 days."

'We should try harder to behave. We're wearing a rut in this floor.'

'Actually this is a very experimental college. We have no curriculum and no classes. How it works, essentially, is if you want to learn something, you go someplace and you learn it.'

'And I see you have a degree from the University of Wikipedia...'

Montessori School vs. Machiavelli School

Two weighing machines, one speaks your weight and the other lies about it.

"I got an 'A' on my math test and I didn't even study. It makes me feel so...so...guilty."